American Idle Judges

I was intrigued to see how American Idol would fare without Simon’s semi-rehearsed, but nevertheless hilarious one-liners. Or his childish giggling with Randy, to the point of near tears. And how would Steve Tyler’s personality fit in the same studio as Ryan Seacrest’s ego? The will-she, won’t she surrounding J-Lo had not made the small print, let alone the headlines here in the UK so I was fairly indifferent about the obligatory, glamorous eye-candy judge appointment. I was very pleased that there was no Ellen De Generes. Don’t get me wrong she was incredibly witty and obviously a big music fan. But seriously, whoever chose her for last season needs to be fired.
So back onto this season’s panel. They are called judges for a reason. They are there to judge whether the batch of sugary sweet, shaggy-dog stories and downright crazy, are worthy of being given a shot at American Idol. Everyone knows that there is a pre-screening process of sorts, guaranteeing TV gold by putting through the best and the worst to be filmed. This is where the judges earn their kudos. Their job is to find someone who can either sing reasonably well and win the people over with their charisma, or completely blow them away vocally and become a major recording artist. We all know that only a handful of finalists have gone on to become anywhere near Idol status. We also know that becoming a recording artist is about more than just being a good singer. Heck, sometimes the singing is totally irrelevant and it it’s purely about ambition and hard work – Madonna, Spice Girls and, I’m afraid, J-Lo herself - all fit well in that category.

The role of the Judges, therefore, is to see past the everyday mediocrity of wedding singers, cruise ship singers, ‘water for lunch’ singers, as Simon calls them, and find something special. Over the years we have seen the judges argue about seemingly good singers who do or don’t have ‘it’. This is what they are paid to do. Every armchair fan can tell whether or not someone can hold a note. They want to hear what the industry professionals really think. They want to see whether that small town kid who looks like the girl next door, is about to have their lives changed. Simon knows this, hence why he is so tough to please. He also knows that the audience will eventually get bored of mediocre singers, which is why I believe last year’s X Factor attracted so much controversy – google Gamu and Cher Lloyd. It was all about finding something completely different.
So far, Steve Tyler is the best thing on American Idol but looks bored by the end of each day. J-Lo claims to be unable to say no, but is actually very good at sarcastic put-downs. And with the panel so biased towards a bland, idle “yes”, even Randy has joined the love-fest. Lets hope they toughen up by Hollywood.